a little honesty
so I'm just putting this out there, in case anyone reads it and has a moment. my husband tries to get me to see these things clearly so I don't worry, but I'm still human.
right now (and since yesterday) I am in a constant state of inner panic. tomorrow night I'm playing at the black rose, opening for the mines. I haven't played a gig in two years (literally almost to the day) and just thinking about it right now makes me tense and panicky inside. it'll be fun, and I'm sure it'll be fine, but I'm terrified right now and can't seem to relax. this is the reason why so many times in my past I have bailed at the last minute for things. i'm not in danger of bailing on the mines, some of my favorite people, but I'm just hoping that my fear and anxiety will lessen.
I have lots of typing to do right now, so I can't even practice or anything, which usually helps me to think clearly, plan for the show, and realize I don't sound like a frog and everything really will be okay.
I'm such a freak. so anyway, if you get a moment, i would appreciate any little prayer for my panic. is that selfish? I don't know. but I'm almost in tears right now, so I really don't care.
5 comments:
No snide remark here...
You will be AWESOME! And I WILL be FUN!
AND I WILL be praying for you. I know those awful pre-gig jitters; the ones that make you want to run and hide and puke your guts out...
BUT it's amazing that things seem always turn out okay. And quite often not just okay, like we hoped, but really, really good. It will be amazing for you, and for all those who listen to your amazing music.
Hang in there...once you get up there all your anxiety will melt away. Do you ever listen to Sara Groves? I love the words in one of her songs..."I live and I breath for an audience of one." Just remember that....and nothing else will matter.
We're coming! That is, if I don't turn into a walking monster. I tend to be pretty cute when I'm sick, so I think I'll play the sympathy 'please take me out' card.
Woman... we can't WAIT. You're going to be fabulous.
Jami, that's a beautiful line from Sara Groves...love it.
you guys are great and I feel better ;)
I haven't listened to sara groves in a long time, jami...what a great line. thank you thank you!!!!
kate, you're always super cute...curt doesn't have a chance against it...so excited you guys are coming! (walking monsters are accepted)
and when I'm done, I'm going to celebrate with a beer (did I say that?!) and shepherds pie that doesn't take freaking three hours to make!! hehehe
girls, there's been this one guy that just keeps having meetings here at beaners...seriously, he's on his third...and there might have been more before I got here!
I'm just all about the long comments today apparently.
Oh boy....this sounds familiar. Breathe....BREATHE! That's what everyone tells me. You'll be great, we all know it. I'll be there routing you on. Go Marie! Shall I bring the belt and flash it to you? OH WAIT! YOU HAVE IT!
How are you doing this afternoon?
Praying for you....
C-U tonight!!!!! Yippy!!!!!
A night out without kids!
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